Important Skill -

If you were called on to produce a list of generally skillful people with whom you have had contact, I wonder what sorts of folks it might include. I can imagine that you might immediately think of an uncle who is crafty with wood, or a cousin who has established a fine business as a plumber. You might think of the man down the road who can fix any vehicle problem you ever have. Or maybe you remember that your mother is among the most skillful because of her excellent culinary skills. It seems somewhat doubtful that you would name anyone on your list who is a particularly skilled conversationalist. You might be quick to agree that being capable of good conversation is a skill, but we really don’t think of good conversationalists as being “skillful” because of that ability.

The art of communication is very important and is a fundamental subject of learning in life. So should it not be a matter of great diligence that parents should teach their children conversation as a very significant means of communicating? And should it not be a matter of prayer for us as adults that God would aid us to develop our conversational skills as a means of fulfilling those Scriptures which direct our relations one with another?

We do tend toward particular difficulties for a variety of reasons. For instance, some of us are prone to think that being a good conversationalist means ensuring that there are never moments of silence when you are in the presence of another person. We imagine that talking about anything is more valuable than enduring, or rather enjoying, an occasional break in conversation. We fail to recognize that conversation engages the mind, requiring actual thought processing. Silence should be seen as an opportunity to reflect on what has been said and to simply enjoy the company of the person with whom you are conversing.

Another failure to converse well is directly related to the ears. Some of us don’t so much mind occasional silence, but we utterly fail to listen when someone else is talking. So instead of appreciating the potential exchange of ideas or thoughts, we arrogantly imagine that while we’re not talking, the only thing to do is to think of how to express our next pearl of wisdom. Of course, once we’re ready, we interrupt what is being said or ignore that which has just been said in order to proceed with our point. But conversation is an exchange and involves listening and interacting, so it is no virtue to be eloquent absent an ability to appreciate the contribution of other parties to the conversation.

It seems that frequently, our inability to converse reveals something of our sinful nature. We think too much of ourselves and do not respect our neighbor. Or we think too little of ourselves and do not imagine our contribution to be helpful. Or we don’t think enough at all. Or we are distracted by worry and anxiety because of a plethora of worldly issues and an insufficient trust in God.

With minds sharpened by the Word of God, we ought to be equipped to engage well in conversation, not only to effectively communicate and discuss God’s Truth but to more intimately know those with whom we keep company.

(While on vacation, I had an extraordinary interest and attentiveness to the effect of my conversations, good and bad; thus the inspiration for this entry.)